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The world was also full of those who function but who are fundamentally dead inside. They have nothing but pain, despair and dullness in their present or future and little ability to contribute to the welfare of others. What kept them going before was only the instinct for self-preservation. In the merge they could experience life in its wondrous complexity, but they lost any strong desire to experience it themselves; that it was experienced was all that mattered. If they and the Mind saw that in the future they would serve only to drag the collective down, not lift it up, then they no longer wished to live. Of course, the mere fact of having a member of the minority emotionally dependent on a person gave him or her a purpose in life. All told, 11% of the majority decided to die, dispatching themselves in an orderly, unobtrusive fashion, little by little over the course of months.Paradoxically, some who might have wished themselves dead before now had a positive role to play, and the. I think that'spart of the reason she wants me out... so she can focus on that biggershit. It'll probably help having me out too, since if mom and dad dodecide to get divorced, they'll probably have to sell the house. Parents'separation, moving... God, it's just more shit for the reboot pile.I get back upstairs, and the progress bar is already at 23%. Only 21minutes left. I could turn on the TV, but instead I just plop on to mybed, watch the progress bar, and eventually fall asleep.*****The buzzing of my iPhone's text message alert roused me from my sleep,though it certainly wasn't early. I rolled over and grabbed it off thenightstand, and it was already 12:45. I unlocked the phone and there werethree text messages from my mother."Headed out for the day. Won't be home tonight. You're on your own fordinner." Need you to pick up your sister from the doctor at 4:00." Also, don't forget to look for apartments. Should be plenty of placesopening up in August."Oh, yay, this should be fun. I.
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